Working For A Living

Being musings on the nature of the hospitality industry and its joys and horrors....

In spite of my relative intelligence and education -- in the 99th percentile in the OPSATs (2nd highest in Ontario in English for that year) (my friend Ian scored the highest) -- a B+ in Canadian Studies from York University and the second (or was it third?) highest mark in my college computer course, i chose to enter the restaurant bizness.  Unlike most of the people who are in it, who are only in it because they couldn't find anything better, couldn't get a job in the factory, i entered voluntarily.  So here i am, underpaid, under-employed, working really hard in lousy conditions (always either too hot or too cold) surrounded by people who behave like they're just down from the trees...

So maybe i'm not so smart after all, and yet, there was a time when i loved it.  Not that i'm allowed to use my creativity, working in a franchise as i do nowadays, but that was a part of the original appeal, the art of cooking.  And there are still aspects that i love -- as when we get really busy unexpectedly but manage to serve all of the meals smoothly, it's the greatest rush imaginable.  (When we get busy unexpectedly and fail to serve smoothly, it's a ginormous bummer though.)

There are people i work with that i like:  Rose and Cassie light up my life;  Marilyn is one of the few in the kitchen i respect; and i'm always happy to work with Billy & Patty.  Most of the waitresses are great lumps but there are a few cute 'n' perky ones (Laura's arse is a work of art, oh, but there's me slipping into "dirty old man" mode again)....

I'm planning to write a pilot for a TV sitcom.  Set in a restaurant.  It'll be about a gifted but neurotic cook and the zany antics that result from his attempts to deal with surly waitresses, incompetent managers, daft kitchen help and a scuzzy salad girl....  I shall call it "Chicken On Wry."  Probably be the biggest thing since "Friends."

Not about me, obviously.  Any resemblance to persons living or dead, etc.  Besides, if it were about me the cook would be gifted, neurotic and a babe magnet