Stupid Conversations – I Haz Dem Part 2

My regular reader may remember that, some years ago, i wrote about a garrulous meathead i have to work with every day. He tried to convince me that he was fluent in German – which i am not, although i know a few basic words, phrases and pronunciations – but i was suspicious when, one day, he mispronounced Angela Merkel's name (with a soft “g”). And he would arrive each day with a hearty “Guten Tagen.” Well, i don't know what that means, but i know that it means neither “good morning” nor “good day” and i grew exasperated. After one “Guten Tagen” too many i lost it: raised my voice in anger and called him a Scheiβkopf. I doubt if he knew what it meant but at least he's no longer trying to communicate in German.

Anyway, since then i've had a few run-ins with this fucktard over word-related matters and, in the interests of catharsis, i would like to share a couple of recent ones with you now. I have lost all patience with this man and up with his nonsense i will not put.

A couple of days ago, after work, i popped in to Montana's (pub) for a couple of beers. It's my medicine (and the bartender is my therapist). The next morning, Scheiβkopf said to me, “did i see you going into Montana's yesterday?” To which i replied (somewhat testily, as i was trying to work) “how the f*** would i know???” He said, you don't know if you were in Montana's yesterday? (This is a small town, everyone wants to know everyone else's business.) No, you, jackass, i know i was there, but i don't know if you saw me going in....

I usually listen to the radio at work in the mornings, and one of the stations i listen to (there are a few) is KOCI from Newport Beach California. One of their slogans is “serving all of Southern California with another classic track.” The other day, the slogan ran and they played “World Turning” by Fleetwood Mac. If that ain't a classic track, nothing is!

However, Mr 30% (i call him that because that's about the amount of effort he puts in) heard this and scoffed. “That's a classic track?!? I've never heard it before, it can't be very classic.” I didn't rise to the temptation to point out that it came from one of the best-selling albums of all time. But this a man who claims that his favourite types of music are rap and country. To me, that means that he doesn't really like music at all!

And of course there are really only two types of music: that which you like and that which you don't.

Honestly, the people i have to deal with daily....